So why is it that so many guys and girls (yes girls too) fail miserably in avoiding the move from the Inbox to the trash can?Extensive research into online dating statistics show that there are some set rules that we all need to follow.So rather than a simple “hey,” or “hi,” go for a “howdy,” which received almost a 45% response rating!
These top 3 intros to avoid include “hi,” “hey,” and “hello.” Sorry if these have been your go-to’s, but it’s time to switch things up.
I will say this though, if it's a dating site that has in its messaging service a subject line, I like to put a cliff hanger in there as a way of practically guaranteeing she reads my message. One that ALWAYS ensured a reply back was "I hope you aren't racist". I guess they always replied so that they could validate themselves somewhat so that they don't feel guilty or racist if they didn't reply. I go back and forth on whether asking a question or making a statement is a better opener. Maybe there's a way to get the to respond to a first message, but I think they have a lot of anxiety about in general.
So rather than type "hey Anna" or something generic like that I might type, "I noticed that..." And then continue the statement in the body of your message. I just try to get their attention in the first message instead of writing a long winded specific message about something in their profile. Tailoring messages to each girl's profile is the way to go.
I know this has been discussed on the ok cupid thread but that thread is vast and a summary on this specific question would be useful. A quick cold-read of their ethnic background works decently for me at getting replies. Recently I've been accusing them of looking like trouble. Wit plays well regardless, but fine-tuning your messages improve your response rate.
When you are sending out a first message on an online dating site, what are proven, tried and tested first messages? I don't think there's going to be any one magic universal opener that will blow the doors off any and every girl. Many examples of guys putting lines up on here and within days being called out for it because every third message she receives is your own opener.. Within those categories, I've observed some patterns for success.